Pretty Much

Almost exactly. Add the Osaka Board of Education and I am with you.

I think no one is reading at this time of year so I am not posting a lot of stuff I was going to. I think I am the only one stranded at home. Taking of for K-1 in an hour. Have a nice New Year's Eve.

Steve's Still Dead

NYT article on my boy Steve Gilliard, who died earlier this year. You may remember that at the beginning of the year this blog featured more politics and was cross-posted on Gilliard's blog. Then he died.

Interesting

A book on the American Depression Epidemic. I get tired of people belittling a serious mental health problem. I am looking at you here Bill Maher.

UFC 79: Yellow, Blue and Green-Lance Hahn Benefit

That would be strange if it were true. UFC 79-minus Matt Serra- takes place Saturday evening. I know it wouldn't be complete without my predictions. It appears our loyal Arash Markazi is moving in on one of my other beats-surfing. What comes next Arash? Are you moving to Kyoto?
As usual, Subfighter has already put the fantasy betting off-limits so I can't look at my actual picks. These picks will be special for you!

Bocek vs. Evans: I don't know much about either guy. Bocek's name has been floating out there for a while. He is very experienced in the world of jiu-jitsu. Evans is from Alaska. Bocek by sub in the 2nd.

Carneiro vs. DeSouza: Carneiro is a guy I would like to root for. Good skill set. Brazilian. Desouza has a giant beard and trains with B.J. Penn. DeSouza by decision.

Lister vs. Radev: Radev is an accomplished wrestler. Lister is the boogeyman. I think that Lister's grappling is levels above Radev's. I really enjoy watching him fight. Very little stand-up in this one. Lister by interesting sub in the 2nd.

Gamburyan vs. Mohr: I would loose to anyone who fights professionally, thats a given, I would be scared to fight Gamburyan. Mohr, I don't know. Gamburyan by G-n-P TKO in the 1st.

Cane vs. Irvin: Irvin is crazy to watch fight. Something is going to explode, whether it is his knee or his opponent's head. Always exciting. Irvin by KO in the 3rd.

Clementi vs. Guillard: Slidell vs. NOLA. That crazy rotating bridge vs. straight up crazy. Guillard is, athletically, the total package. Explosive. His body shot KO on Gabe Rudeiger is legendary. But, he is prone to dumb mistakes. Clementi is pretty much the reverse of that, with less cocaine in his system. Guillard by KO in the 2nd.

Machida vs. Sokoudjou: Probably my fight of the night. I really love both of these fighters. Machida is frustrating to people. Some don't like to watch him fight. I admire him as a technician. He owns wins over some of the giants in the sport. I really enjoy watching his odd style and counter-striking. Sokoudjou is a judoka with bombs for hands. Machida waits him out until he gasses. Machida by decision.

Palalei vs. Sanchez: Very little opinion on this fight. Sanchez can throw hands against anyone not named Mirko. Sanchez by 2nd round KO

Liddell vs. Silva: I should be super stoked about this. Wait. Let me climb in my time machine and go back two years. This fight could be more abut the return of Wandy than the fight itself. I did have this going to Chuck. Chuck is great at KOing people who chase after him. Witness Babalu. Silva is great and chasing people down. I have changed my mind. I think Silva is going to win it by virtue of the fact that he now trains with Couture. Who better to game plan with? Wandy by KO in the 2nd.

Hughes vs. St. Pierre: Hughes has been a dominant fighter over the years. But, I will say what I say every time; Can he improve? I don't think he can. I think he is as strong as he is going to get. His wrestling is as good as it is going to get. His striking shows no signs of getting much better. None of this is good enough to defeat GSP. GSP was better last time and he keeps getting better. GSP out wrestled Koscheck, who I would consider a better, more explosive wrestler than Hughes. There is always a danger that Hughes gets on top and GSP can't get out. I see GSP 2nd round KO. Serra has to wait to fight Hughes in the barn

Take it to the bank.

I Get the Strange...

...st spam mail. It says things like, "Take control of your ejaculation in 2008!" Thank you I will. And, "May your penis reach its full size this year." With any luck, it just might! They really have a handle on the issues that present themselves in my life. Why don't they send me mail like, "Give us $50 bucks and we'll tell you how to finish the novel that was almost finished this time last year." Or "We really like the album you are making, please sell it to us." Or, "Please come to our graduate school." Or, "Since you really are good at your job and everyone thinks so, why don't you go ahead and keep it." Or, "You are no longer the last 30 year old in the world who can't get a credit card." How about some spam mail like that.

edit: I just translated this to Japanese and then back to English with an online translator, as I know some Japanese people who try to read this site that way. It was pretty funny in Japanese. Here it is back in English for those of you who are not Ed or Jennifer.(Or a loyal Japanese literate reader that I am unaware of.)

The スパム mail of st. That seems like the thing which is said, "in 2008 control of acquisition of your ejaculation! "Me thank you. And, "range large-sized this year of the May your penis. "It causes all lucks and, that exactly and the れ is! There is a steering wheel of the problem which really shows them themselves of my life in those. Why you do not send the mail those like me, if "the wooden び coming stand of the $50 is given to us, most this time. "The we are the method of finishing the novel which last year is ended or" we like the album which really you make, sell to us. "Or," do to come in our graduate schools. "It does not go or why to forward and, that. "Really it is possible to be your work because and everyone so thinks, whether it does not maintain,", or, ". How like that concerning the スパム mail which old last 30 years already is not in the world where it is not possible "to obtain the credit card?

and how!

If You Follow....

Japanese politics....dozo.

K-1 Dy-No-Mite!!!

Two tickets to K-1 New Year's Eve.
That's how I'm livin' in the 関西　son.
Nephew. What. Too bad the card is fair
to middlin'.

I Did It

I signed up at Purebred Kyoto.
These guys are no joke. They fight in the bigs.
I predict pain. The gym doesn't reopen until the 5th so I am still stranded in my house getting fat and doing nothing productive while it rains and gets colder.

It' s Raining

It's Raining here so I really can't go out and do anything. I need to find a job, but it is the end of the year and I can't really contact anyone. But I always have this.

My Other Favorite Christmas Song

Merry Christmas

From my students to you!

My New Favorite Song

Check it out. I think No Idea is signing them soon, so hop on the bandwagon now!

I Never New Romney Was a Mexican Immigrant

Check it out. Really, he is from a family of illegal immigrants from Mexico. Think it will be brought up. They are white immigrants.

Christmas

I guess it's Christmas here. Who would know? I don't care. I'd rather not be here for Christmas. Akko invited me down to Uji. That was very nice of her but I really didn't feel like going out to drink for Christmas. Now it is almost 4 and I can't sleep as usual. New Year's should be better.
So I stayed in and watched the police chase the Bosozoku around and watched Project Runway. Great.

Christmas Eve Eve

I guess Christmas Eve Eve is over in America. Christmas Eve itself is over here (almost). I did nothing, but it is really hard to care about Christmas while I am in Japan. I am looking forward to New Year's. Summer always declared Christmas Eve Eve the best day of the year. I think that is probably true in America. I have no radio show so it is time to bust out the greatest Christmas song ever.

Support Impeachment Hearings

Congressman Wexler wants 150,000 signatures on his website to start impeachment hearings for Vice President Cheney. Hey has 100,000 now. It takes about 5 seconds to sign. Go here.

The Huckabee Dilemma

Watching the Right trip over their own tied together shoelaces over Mike Huckabee's ascendancy is amusing. For years conservatives, with the help of the media, have tried to tell us that Republicans faith is what helps them win. That they are in simpatico with the fabled heartland. Of course, the Right has been using religion as patter while their accomplices reach into your handbag and take your wallet. The true goal has always been to convert public money into private money (much like water into wine) and to deconstruct government in whatever way possible. Now they have to wash in the bathtub stained by their years of filth. Huckabee is their own Frankenstein set loose. He is all of the religion, all of the patter, but he forgot the next part of the act. He is the magician who believes he is actually magic. All that being said, I ain't fer 'em, I agin 'em but, he reminds a lot of the good-hearted, completely wrong and misguided Southern Baptists that I grew up around. He believes it. Now the voices of the Right have to figure out how to tell you that Huckabee is wrong but that you still have to believe their religious smokescreen. A most dangerous game.

And Why Would They Not?

Keep The South beautiful!

Oil on Canvas

I really dig this oil on canvas by Chris Roth.

Sokoudjou

How can you not pull for this guy?

Old But Not Surprising

Article about foreigners treatment in Japanese courts. The photographed absurd re-enactments should be familiar to anyone who has had to deal with police here. The McGowan case, mentioned towards the end of the article, should also be familiar. "He doesn't like _____" (black people, white people, foreigners) is an acceptable explanation of why you aren't allowed access to a store or restaurant or bar or shop or onsen, and there is no Japanese law to prevent this. I am sure Ed will remember the absurd run-around we were given at a particular bar in Miyazaki where we were actually friends with the staff and customers but where the owner-who advertised it as a "R&B/Black Music Bar" wouldn't allow foreigners...sometimes. When we would complain we were given the explanation, "Well, you have to understand, he just doesn't like foreigners." If I went to a bar where the owner, "Just didn't like Japanese people." I would be ashamed. And so it goes.

Chad, I'm Confused. Does this Mean We Won, Or Lost?

Mikuni Christmas Cleaning

One of the many reasons why it sucks to lose my job. These kids remember about three words from a Christmas song that they heard somewhere and decide to do a performance of it during our year end cleaning. They keep posing for a photo so I have to tell them that I am filming, not taking a photo. Thus showtime begins.

For Now

They've stopped whaling for now. Well, Humbacks anyway. Although the reasons they give doesn't seem like anything has changed. Maybe Australia threatening to follow them around and document everything they did made them give in. Good for Australia.

My Brain Hurts

It's a good thing that my Christmas break starts after Friday because I am strugglin'. I am exhausted all day so I come home and can't do anything and I usually take a nap but it doesn't bring me back up to the level of true awakeness I check up on whatever Gordon Ramsay might have done television wise and poke around for a while and play Winning Eleven and listen to the radio but I never get it together to do anything I need to do, or really want to do. Then I try to go to sleep and I can't. I can't at all. Like now. It is near on 2:30 so I have to get up fro work in just over 4 hours but I can't sleep because I took a nap earlier, but 4 hours sleep isn't nearly enought o function so I will go through another day like this. This is why I sucked at high school; I was constantly exhausted. College, no problem. Excepting math of course. Oh, the life of the unmedicated depressive. A joyous thing.

Exactly

100% f'ing correct. If you don't think this has everything to do with why I am being laid off with no recourse, then.....Man, it's got everything to do with it. This shit's getting old. No I don't hate Japan. I hate its government. Except for the part that gives me cheap insurance. That part is awesome.

the yes yes y'all’s Political Songs

Here are some political songs. "The Rev" was supposed to be a fired up political bit opening with Al Sharpton addressing the Democratic National Convention. Unfortunately the Democrats lost right before we recorded vocals so I had no passion for it and just mumbled through a phaser.

"Phasing" Begins with a Huey P. Long quote. I haven't recorder vocals for it yet. There you go.

A Very Particular Discovery

If you are trying to upload Adobe Audition mixdowns to Lastfm, you should export the mixdown as an MP3 and not a .wav, this will make your life easier.

Strange Things Afoot!

I hadn't mentioned that Friday was the Mikuni 忘年会　end of the year drinking party. The judo teacher, who took a hate to me was wearing a suit so I started giving him shit about it. He decided to like me again and force-fed me beer. We both got 'faced and decided we were the only hard men at the gathering. Now he likes me. How long will this last?

To begin that story though, Friday morning I walked into the school to witness old judo coach in a verbal spat with the soccer coach. They were going at it pretty hardcore. Being trashed later I discussed this with the 二次会　warriors. Apparently they were arguing over the same thing judo teacher got mad at me about, his territorialism over his beloved dojo. Hmm.

Also, Yoshida sensei, who sits next to me, was very disturbed by news of my canning. She said she would call the Osaka Board of Ed. She also told the principal. I was excited but, all it has led to so far is a few phone numbers that might tell me of a school that is hiring. I really want to stay at my school. Ever since I left JET I have been hoping to end up somewhere nice for a bit. In the process I have turned 30 and not gone to grad-school. Maybe it is time to say "fuck it." To quote the rooster.

I Can't Be Stopped

Here are some more tunes I made today/ yesterday. I might do vocals in the next week or two. I don't know....Ed???? These are just the raw products. I have mixed other stuff in over the loops but I haven't been able to upload those yet. I guess I have to remember how to write lyrics.

Also, these aren't the real album covers...I am having trouble getting the real ones to the correct aspect ratio. Forgiveness please.

To anyone who knows what I am talking about: I have been using these doo-doo speakers for a while. I loaded up the old 808 today and found that it doesn't even register on these. It just kind of hums softly. To be corrected at my neighbor's horror.

For the Record

I have always disliked Roger Clemens. He has always seemed like a phoney to me. Guess what.....he is. Surprise. What an embarasment. For shame.

Kabu

This is the Kabu. The turnip radish. I now love it. When Brett left for Korea he got stuck with a bunch of organic vegetables that Zack had talked him into ordering and then fled the country. I bought them for $20 and worried that they would go to waste. Yesterday, hungover and immobile with knee pain I decided to make a soup. First I cut up this bad boy and decided to eat him raw. Best vegetable I have ever eaten, hands down. The outside tastes like raw potato and feels colder towards the middle. It isn't sweet but it isn't bitter. The stems taste like warm butter, even though they were in the fridge.


The soup turned out quite good, but sliced up and raw is the way to go on this one. Oh, kabu! I sing your praises.

Kid's Brains

Are weird, but tasty. I have been doing a Christmas lesson all week with second-year students. The lesson has two parts. One is a worksheet. At the top is a box with about ten Christmas related words, about half of which the kids don't know. Under that are ten sentences about Christmas with blanks in them. I made it a little difficult on purpose because I am trying to get them to think about what clues the sentence is giving them, not trying to translate the whole thing (as they are taught to do.) Also I am trying to get them to say "Help. What's this?" In English. I included words like Hannukah and Kwanzaa to see what they would do when they have no clue. Usually about 6-7 kids in a class of 35-40 could get all of them right in about 10-15 minutes. That is pretty okay I think. They would usually switch around Hannukah and Kwanzaa, but that means that their instincts were right. After about 15 minutes, we stop and check. Then I gave out another worksheet. This time it was a wordsearch with about 20 Christmas words. It is nuts, the human brain. The kids who did so well at the fill in the blank can get about 6-10 words in 10 minutes. The kids who just stared at the fill in the blank come close to finishing. 1-2 kids will tear through the wordsearch, finding the words in order even, and finish well before everyone else. Very odd thing to watch. Just reinforces, I guess, that there are many kinds of 'smart.'

Air America, Whither Thou Goest?

I am a nut for radio. When Air America came out, I was so stoked. I became a member as soon as I could and download all of the podcasts religiously. I endured when many of the best shows in the history of radio went by the wayside; from Morning Sedition to Unfiltered, from The Majority Report to The Marc Maron show. The powers at AA seem to be doing everything they can to slaughter good radio. Even if I agree with Randi Rhodes politics my desire to listen to her show is matched only by my desire to drink on Tuesdays at the Holiday Inn lounge, which is to say 'zero.' Rachel Maddow is alright but walks the line between okay and boring so nimbly as if to seem deliberate.

Now, AA has fired Kent Jones. Kent Jones has been a continous bright spot through all of these shows and somehow remained as everyone else went away. What are they thinking. I guess they want to appeal to mid-40s hopeless women who live in one room apartments comforted by their cats and the hope that beautiful gay men will turn straight for them. I am not sure what they are thinking. It goes back to our theme of the week (month, year) that those who make the decisions have to right to be making these decisions.

To deepen the mystery, the last good show left on AA, The Young Turks, has disappeared over the last two days. What is going on? No one knows.

Drag

Well, as of March I have no job. Great. That isn't stressful at all; back where I started. Let me explain. NOVA, the giant English company couldn't handle its shit and went belly-up. For some reason, to save money, the City of Osaka had contracted with them to provide English teachers (NOVA teachers are notoriously second-rate) Since they went bankrupt they couldn't fufill the contract. The company I contracted with took over part of the contract. At the end of Febuary, that contract expires. The Japanese school year ends in March, and begins again in April. All of the companies who provide English teachers must bid on the new contracts around that time(when the fiscal year begins). The deal will go to the lowest bidder(s). Those contracts will start in June, two months after the school year. ??????????? So, maybe my company will get the contract again. In the meantime their 100 teachers will have to sit on their hands and hope or find new jobs. Then, the new contracting agencies will have a few days/weeks to find teachers for the Osaka Schools. They will advertise in the same free papers where people get jobs passing out tissue or washing dishes. Moral: when Japan says it cares about education, it is lying. My schools like me a lot. The teachers I work with want me back. My classes are effective. My company says I am the best teacher they have and get first call on anything that comes in. The kids like me. The judo club likes me. I love my job. I really love my job. This is garbage. I don't know why, America included, countries feel they can lie about education. They say it is important and then do everything to show that it isn't. Pay teachers? How? Iraq? Cut the check. Oh, we are so concerned that Japan is falling behind, let's hire the Bolivian frog gigger to work with our children(nothing against Bolivia). It is indicative of everything I have been talking about. Good, smart people don't run things. Retarded people do and everyone else just has to deal with it. The same people who decide who are good teachers decide that Jay-Z is a good rapper. So I wrote some lines to him, as I feel this whole mess is his fault.

I'm a better MC than Jay-Z
That hayseed
he frolics with beyonce
while I waste what some say
was a promising life
I drop the bomb and he drops little knifes
I'll make him my mid-wife
While I toast to my self-worth
He can sweep up the afterbirth

Competent

This is a really interesting story about people who are very good at their jobs. This is the kind of progress and compelling work we need in America on all fronts. And it mentions Bama...Roll Tide.

Politics: O'Donnel Hits One Out of the Park.

More Politics

The Mike Huckabee paroled rapist scandal should be some of the biggest news out there. Not because one rapist/murderer is more important than the next but because this man was allowed to rape and murder for only one reason: the insane, illogical, asinine and juvenile anti-Clinton hysteria that has led our country around by the nose for the last 16 years. If you are not familiar with the scandal I will say briefly that an Arkansas rapist, and confessed murderer became a conservative cause when he raped Bill Clinton's cousin. It was alleged that the sentence he received was too harsh and that he was a victim of the Clinton goons. When will our media realize that people take this stuff seriously and that they are the same people that the media and power structure decided should run our country for us. Huckabee got the guy released from prison, over the pleas of his victims, only to have him rape and murder again. Because they believe that Bill Clinton is evil. This passes for the leadership of our country. This is insanity. George Bush decides that Habeus Corpus doesn't matter and no one says boo. But people can make up anything about Bill CLinton they want and it forgives anything they do. It isn't just the rapist. It is Iraq. It is global warming. It is Israel/Palestine. They are forgiven all of their insanity and deep, deep sickness.

Let me Talk Right Down to Earth in a Language That Everyone Here Can Easily Understand

There has been lots of political stuff that I have been meaning to get to. Let me mention this that I meant to mention a week ago. So Pres. Bush (appointed) gave a press conference last week to discuss the National Intelligence Estimate Report on Iran. Of course, it turns out that the government knew a while back that Iran had halted its nuclear weapons program and had sat on the report so they could try to rile everybody up about a war with Iran. Caught in this deception, Pres. Bush said that Mike McConell, his Director of National Intelligence had come to him months ago, told him there was new information on Iran and that was all. How can that be all? How? If you are the President and you are discussing constantly how Iran is a rapidly brewing crisis and your Director of Intelligence comes to you and says "We have new information." To you let it go at that? Do you not press them and press them and make sure you understand it all pefectly. This is the most ridiculous kind of lie because it has to be a lie and we have to pretend that it is true. If it is true, then shouldn't Bush step down immedietly as an ineffective leader? This goes back to what I have been saying for years about Enron being the pattern for the current government. We are told repeatedly, "We are professionals. Just trust us." Then, when something bad happens they say, "Look, I don't really have any power over anything. I don't know what goes on inside these offices that I run." Really? If that is the case, then don't ask for the fucking job. It goes back to my favorite line in one of my favorite movies "I know he can get the job, but can he do the job!" Really, all of these people can get the job, ir is obvious, it has been obvious that they can't do the job. If the press lets this lie go, like every other weak ass lie then.....then what? We already have gone further than I ever thought we could down this road. Pathetic.

I'm Ta-rd.

Dead dog tired. Plum tuckered out. I couldn't get to sleep last night. When I finally did, Cameron and Alex thought it would be funny to call my repeatedly, presumably drunk, at 2:30 in the morning. I got up at 6:20 but never really got up. I decided to take a new route to school-Hankyu to Umede, Sennichimae line to Tiashibashi Imaichi. It was faster.

Today I taught the bane of my teaching career; 2-4. Imaichi, 2-4. I rather like their homeroom teacher. He has the desk next to mine and is the hulking rugby coach as well as a nice guy. 2-4 is full of half-wits and chowder heads. It also presents a good lesson in the problems with team teaching.

Team teaching assumes that we are not real teachers, we are special guests. In most classes, the teachers and students have taken me on as a real teacher and I haven't had many problems. However, the environment makes discipline confusing. Who's job is it? Am I a step-parent? An uncle? A guest in the home? Do I have a right to discipline a kid? Do they think I have the right to discipline them? To confuse all of this, the teacher for all of the 2nd year classes at Imaichi, while being a nice guy, is kind of a nice guy. He lets a lot of shit go. The problem with 2-4 is that they talk constantly through everything that I am trying to say. There are kids in the class who are trying to do the lesson and the rest just talk. I tell them repeatedly to stop talking. I don't whine about it. I don't say "Please, please, pretty please, you Kings of New England." At this point I ask them at the first of class, "Can we have class today?" I know the kids by name. I stop the class and ask them, by name, why they are talking and knocking the desks around and being pests. If it were just me in the class I would go over the top, grab the worst one, and throw them out of class. I wanted to today. Not in a lose my shit kind of way. But to tell them that they aren't allowed to act the fool in my classes. But, with the presence of another teacher I have to walk a tight rope. But I know he isn't going to do anything.

To make it worse, and what really pissed me off today is that one of the girls, who was sitting in the back doing everything but paying attention, said to me, "I'm sorry I don't understand English." When I got on to her. That actually pissed me off. That is why me and James go on about the "I'm sorry, I don't speak Spanish." scene in Anchorman. When the girl, and the boy next to her were acting up during the class, I walked to the back and said to both of them, "You can't act like this in my class. I have asked you nicely, now it is time to quit, got it?" In perfectly intelligible Japanese, that was her response. I think that that is so insanely disrespectful that I do see it as a reason to make her leave class. Also, it undermines discipline altogether. This problem has been recurrent in Japanese classes. I imagine that a lot of teachers are kind of oblivious to it and are made a joke of a good deal of the time. Homey don't play that. I used to have these terrible neighbor children in Saito. They would run in my house without asking. If I yelled at them in Japanese, they would laugh. If I yelled at them in English, they would say, "We can't understand." Annoying. As a larger issue it is one reason why I hate most English TV personalities. They allow themselves to be made a joke of for profit so mos Japanese people, especially children, see foreigners as 'funny people' even in a serious situation, even when they aren't joking. I ain't no joke son.

Oh look, I found a video of my Christmas lesson:

I Can't Stop

Here is a rough overview of the album I am working on now, tentetively called December. Because it is December. I haven't put down any vocals. I am thinking of doing them in a real studio this time as I live in a giant city. Not that Ed's bedroom, shower, closet and living room, aren't equally charming. Also, these are just the basic tracks. There will probably be more junk hung on them. Let me know i fy ou like them and feel that I should have a job doing this instead of what I really do and if the world is cruel and unfair to me (hint: it is, but I am not special in that regard.)

If you want to embed this in your own blog, or myspace or anything...please do! I will put up some other yes yes y'all stuff soon.

I Can Stop

I have meant to write an assortment of post over the past week but I have been either drunk, tired or both. Now I am just one. Pick! I am sorry for the lack of interesting content, but I felt I couldn't bring the heat. I had an end of the year party on Friday and drank with the teachers. My team one the quiz game, partly on the strength of me being able to find Myanmar on a map and later by pulling the highest value card out of a pile. Congratulaions me. No after party meaning an hour long ride on the train, standing up drunk. Back to Kyoto where I meet Brett downtown and trade Brett a used hardrive for a bag of organic vegetables. On to the raggae show with Atsuko-most certainly my type- where I listen to some half decent live raggea, feel left out, get left out and then have my vegetables stolen from right under my nose only to ride my bike 20 minutes home in the Kyoto humi-freeze. On to Saturday where I hang out with Akko even though I didn't really feel like it. Found a good Korean restaurant called Puruda-I recommend- drank even though I didn't want to, tried to be entertaining and went to a bar where one of the guys told me I was very handsome. Congratulations me. I was then told, for the second time this month, and by two people, that I look like the dude from Prison Break. Only because I have a shaved head and a map tattoed on my body. The funny thing is; that's true! So Akko talks me into watching a movie, after drinking, that starts at 12. It is my first trip to the theater in my neighborhood, which is rad, and we saw the Bourne Ultimatum, which was probably good but I was beer drinking tired. I remember there being things in the movie I wanted to talk about.....but I can't think of them now. By the way, never read the books. They are absolute garbage and the only reason I finished all 9,000 pages of one of them is the same reason I don't walkout of movies or leave sporting events early. I think I would have walked out of Domino...what an incredible load of shite. Are there as many typos in this as I feel that there are?

It Was Me...I Did It.

I only post on one message board. It is the only message board I have ever posted on. I got a thread locked down yesterday due to my smart mouth. Oh. Should I feel bad about this? All I did was ask if Matt Hughes' new autobiography came with 3-D glasses or just had regular pop-ups. I see a trend in my life that goes all the way back to elementary school. It tells me to keep my mouth shut but, no.....sadly, no.

Your Real Tune for the Galaxy

I am messing around with LastFM. Where were they when I was in high school. I uploaded an album that me and Ed (that would be 'Ed and I' for those who aren't professional teacher's of English like I) made years ago. Its genius stands the test of time. Hopefully being able to do this will make me (or us) make more.

Your Tune for the Day

A present from loyal reader Ed, in Tokyo Disneyland.

Thinking About America

the greatest country in the world

はーい！日本語なら出来ます！

めっちゃ久しぶりに日本語を出来るようになってきた！けど日本語出来へん。。。残念。

Short Skirt ?Yes Indeed

Because it is that time of year and I was in Kyoto Eki today. Homina. Homina.

I Don't Know....Faggot

To quote David Cross. Here is an interesting article from loyal reader Susan B. out in Chinatown-The Country! Which is odd because I was talking to two of the teachers at school today who were very concerned over one boy at school, who walks like a girl, talks like a girl, is interested and girls stuff and wants to be a stewardess. They were tyring to figure out what might be the problem. "Maybe he is gay." I offered. Feeling bad for immediaely putting together gay and effeminate. I told them how odd I found it that Japanese people get so weirded out by people who are up front about being gay, but that Japanese guys do so many things that would be stereotyped very quickly as gay in America. Gender as a construct ladies and gentleman. Reading the article you might think pthat's great! You can take their lunch money and their women- But...a lot of girls really dig guys like this. It appears to me as pathetic. But I am biased, being the ideal of American male virility. And by virility, I mean 'virusy.' Virilitic.

Mess With the Bull...

Mess with the pirated operating system and you get the... I wouldn't know because I don't do things like that. In any case, I was trying to install a new operating system, as mine won't speak Japanese, and my computer up and died. I bought a cheap, used hard drive for $30 bucks and replaced the old one that I had reserved just for the OS. Somehow
I got the master/slave relationship wrong(if i had a penny) and the computer rebooted to my former OS and desktop which had been lost and assumed to stay that way...odd. It is like getting your ex-girlfriend pregnant at the class reunion and having a cute baby that you never wanted.

Florida= Weird

Here is an interesting article on the ongoing Sean Taylor murder. It touches on a little bit of the strange duality of a lot of Florida communities. I am from nowhere near Miami but I always feel as if my image of where I am from and other people's is vastly different. I know that the school I went to is highly rated academically and regarded as a nice place, but I remember it as being this haven of random violence and crime. I know that Ft. Walton/ Destin is supposed to be an affluent resort area but I remember it as being hardscrabble with a sordid underbelly. Am I remembering wrong? Did I make it all up? Were there not really crack deals going down in junior high? Were people not getting run over with cars in the FWBHS parking lot for beefs of dubious origin? Did it all not seem like it could turn on you for no reason whatsoever at any moment? Where does Summer weigh in on this? Am I loopy? In any case, even before Taylor's murder you heard all of this talk about how he was from the good part of town, so no one could understand how he seemed to be wrapped in the bad at times. All I got to say is that that sounds like Florida to me and I don't know what else to say on it.

Evel Dead

You try to live a healthy life. You try to play by the rules and do everything right. Then, for some reason, at the young age of 69, Jesus done calls you home.

Evel Knievel died. At home! Of natural causes!! That is probably his greatest stunt. Job well done Mr. Knievel. Sometimes it is hard to remember what a large psychic force this guy was on the U.S. in the late '70s early '80s. I remember building bike ramps and riding over them yelling "He's down. He's hurt. He's not even moving. He's hurt." Which was the call from his infamous Ceaser's Palace jump. These were the days when descramblers were our Youtube and it took a special kind of crazy to go national. He is like the Pittsburgh Steeler's Superbowl years. I know I must have been too young to actually watch but they are somehow present in my memory. Fucking nutcase. Well played sir.

Conservapedia Smokes the Hog

This report about the top ten hits on Conservapedia had been floating around the internets for the past few days. It appears as if it might lack a bit in veracity. Nevertheless it points out some essential weirdness that is constantly present in the conservative world. As Wes Clark Jr. says, "They want to smoke the hog." I have stayed away from the armchair psychology of saying that everyone who is against something is, in fact, that mysterious something in secret. But clearly, there is a huge repressed subculture in conservative circles that really wants to have sex with men. Even if these top ten entries on Conservapedia prove to be false, look at some of their real entries. The first line, after stating that Bill Clinton was the president between the Bushes reads, "Clinton aggressively advocated homosexuality." Really? Really? I don't remember that. I certainly don't remember it being the centerpiece of his presidency. There has to be something to this obsession.

The First?

It appears as if, unfortunately, the first death in the short history of MMA will be occurring in the near future. Not to minimalize the health situation of this guy and what his family is going through, but this was somewhat inevitable. I am sure there will be some degree of outcry. Of course, deaths happen every year in high school football, but it isn't a sport under scrutiny. It looks now as if Mr. Vasquez was suffering from a blood clot before his Oct. 20th bought in Houston. I hope he pulls through, but being moved to a hospice is not a great sign for improvement.

Update: Mr. Vasquez died today. He had a wife and a son. It appears as if he had a preexisting medical condition.

The View Out My Apartment

My neighborhood. Power lines. Nijo Station. Movie theatre.

Your Tune For the Day

Death Talk

nijyojyo koyou127, originally uploaded by wwc photos.

Sean Taylor's death sucks a lot. I think it bothers me because it is very similar to what happened to Kumar. Also the guy was young and played safety(I tried to play safety). Two things about his killing: 1. The way people get shot on TV is completely wrong. Taylor was shot in the leg and died. He didn't hop around and say, "Ow man, you shot me!" That is one reason I liked the accidental shooting in Pulp Fiction so much. You play around with guns people die, immediately. 2. When there is a dispute over police shootings and people say, "Why couldn't they just shoot him in the leg?" Because it is hard to 'just shoot someone in the...anywhere.' Also because people die from being shot in the leg just as easily as they die from being shot in the face. That doesn't mean I think it is okay for the police to shoot people, just that it is a ridiculous complaint to say that they just could have shot them in the legs and it makes your argument sound stupid. Anyway, no late hits on Lance Hahn's ghost or Norman Mailer will stab you. Oh, you gotta love that Taylor came out with a machete. Florida in the house.

Kyoto Arkansas?

nijyojyo koyou089, originally uploaded by wwc photos.

Although Kyoto is certainly lovely, I wonder sometimes if they just dropped old castles or temples over Little Rock or Birmingham if it wouldn't have the same feel. Right Mom? Right? My neck is still killing me so some of these photos might be lopsided.

Nijo-jo

nijyojyo koyou052, originally uploaded by wwc photos.

I went down the street to Nijo-Jo today. A week and a half ago I went with Toshi. The leaves hadn't quite turned. I noticed today that they were almost gone. I ran down at closing time to get some photos. Most of them were taken in haste. Forgiveness please.

Eating Whale Necks

fukuoka 2007082, originally uploaded by wwc photos.

Last night I had a nomikai with the teachers from Mikuni. It was for the teachers of first year students. I teach all years but I sit with them. The old men like me now because I drank shyochu with them. What I didn't do was eat the whale necks. We got their early so they served us whale necks while we were waiting. I asked if they were really whale necks. "Yes." Fuck that. The old guys laughed at me. There is a new Japanese response. "In some countries they eat dogs." I told them that babies probably taste good, but I don't eat them. The old science teacher told me that the modern world is fucked. He said he smokes in front of his students and says, "That's my nutrition." Because everyone else tells them smoking is bad. That's kind of funny. I kind of respect that in a terrible, horrible way.

My Neck, My Back

fukuoka 2007068, originally uploaded by wwc photos.

Sometime yesterday, I managed to injure my neck. A lot. Really bad. It hurts like a truckload of hurt hurts. I can't look left. I am not exaggerating. It is true and real pain. Help. I hope it goes away tomorrow. Getting out of bed is very hard. I had to kind of lift my head with one hand and scoot out. At Imaichi they are learning judo and I was helping out. That might have done it, but everyone yesterday was very weak. One kid was goofing off and Ohara sensei picked him up by the lapels and threw him into a wall. It was money. I taught a class by myself. The kids were so-so. I took one's tennis ball and threw it out the window and made another sit in a special desk at the front of the class. He said he wouldn't move. I said 'You don't way that much." He kept asking, "What does that mean?" I said that it meant that it really didn't matter if he moved himself or not. Then he moved. The problem with jr. high kids is they always have to try and save some dignity so they act sullen or keep trying to act like they are getting away with something and you either have to go over the top or ignore it. I didn't like them even when I was one.

James Draws Well

fukuoka 2007140, originally uploaded by wwc photos.

I'm envious. It must be relieving to be able to produce art. This is James at dinner drawing in Natsuki's friend Kayo's notebook.

Kyushu Basho

fukuoka 2007083, originally uploaded by wwc photos.

Sorry for the no posting. I have been going to work and then falling asleep. I went to Fukuoka for the Kyushu Basho. Lots of drama as Asashyoryu is still out on suspension. Kotooshyu is still out. Kaiyo was threatening retirement and Chiyotaikai was pushing Hakuho for the championship. Takamisakari is still an f'ing nutcase. Chad and James came up. James got the bus up on Saturday and didn't have a place to stay. I left him at Jacky's- the Southern themed bar-after a shot of Wild Turkey and a beer. I got up with him after 9 phone calls in the morning to a response of, "Well I've been better." Chad actually beat him to the venue even though he left from Miyazaki and James was only 20 minutes away. It was nice to confront the day with no hangover. There were some great bouts in the lower divisions. The main events seemed a bit lacking as Chiyotaikai dropped out due to injury, thereby eliminating any play-off with Hakuho. We also thought it had robbed Kaiyo of his final bout in front of his hometown fans, but he announced later that he isn't retiring. The bout of the night, easily was Baruto and.....who was it??? Baruto and somebody going back and forth for minutes. Kotomitsuki upset Hakuho in the last bout, which was nice. It also meant we got to throw pillows! Yeah!

Complete the Circle

Sumo Better Blues

I'm off to Fukuoka for our annual way beyond drunk sumo weekend. Although I don't plan on getting drunk this year. Chad and James are a definite for sumo. Cam dropped out to study for the ikkyu. Jamie and Nathan both came down with colds. So it will be a weekend of ramen and sumo and my homeboys. I discovered that I can purchase Shinkansen tickets at Nijo Station in front of my house. Sweet. I had been putting off going to Kyoto-eki. Who knew? So I won't be around for a few days. I will be back with pictures and stories and I am putting up a bunch of youtube junk I have been meaning to put up to entertain the children. I went to the laundrymat and the ATM with my fly down. Nice. I am sofa king we todd ed. Oh, this will be my first Basho in forever with out Asashoryu. He is still in the doghouse for playing in a charity soccer match(read: being Mongolian) and on suspension. Chiyotaikai has a share of the lead. Kaiyo, as usual, is ready to plummet and retire. I hope it comes down to the final day. Chiyotaikai over Hakuho would be nice. Chiyotaikai is from Oita, which is next to Miyazaki, so we pull for him. I usually pull for Asa too, since he is such a pimp. Of course I will be most stoked for Takamisakari, the sumo ODB.

Magic, thanks!-Shameswoman

Magic tHANKSGIVING sHAMAN

Happy Thanksgiving

That's Odd, I Went to Immigration Today

Article on Gaijinary and how we shall all be fingerprinted from now on. At immigration today they told me I needed my actual college diploma and a letter of release from my former employer and all of my former tax records. Is this over-kill? I think, a bit.

This article also. The e-mail is fake, but pretty much what the real one would be.

I see the 'help prevent terrorism' signs on my way to work every day. Oh Japan, you are so big and important. Everyone wants to attack your bus lines. It wasn't looney Japanese people who gassed you subways. It was us crazy foreigners, no longer content to drink your beer and chat up your daughters. If they really wanted to keep out undesirable foreigners that would start handing out chastity belts.

The Red Hills of Georgia

I forgot to mention that last week my student, Miss Shibata, took 4th in the Osaka speech contest. I got worried when I found out that I would have to help her practice the 'I Have a Dream Speech." Is that really the territory for Japanese jr. high kids? I asked her if she was okay with interposition and nullification. She actually managed to get those out, although she had some problem with "heat of oppression." I told her to say "he dove a pression" instead. Seemed to work. I also told her that MLK's speaking voice wasn't so much loud as it was big. She did well with that.

Oh! I found a copy of her speech.

A Tune for Your Day

The Analogy of the Tape Player

Yoshida-sensei and I have been teaching "I like, You like, He/She/It likes" To 1st years for the last two weeks. She is convinced this is the hardest thing to grasp ever. I think it is marginally annoying. The counter system and its further pronunciation variations is was harder to get a handle on. When you first approach it it seems bewildering. You check with a chart telling you what word you should use for long, cylindrical objects and what word you should use for birds and rabbits, and pretty soon you remember it. These kids can't do that because, as I have said before, they have never been taught how to assemble a sentence, so it is just a big pile of junk to them. Today, 3 minutes into class, Yoshida-sensei, who I am going to trash a lot today, but who I like, realizes that, even though she told me that class 1-4 understood "s-es" so I should make a harder lesson for them, they didn't actually know it. SOme kids could do the lesson well, others were lost. I just asked them to do things like "I like apples. She likes Apples. I play baseball. He plays baseball." Of course I got the inevitable "I like plays baseball." If these kids had ever been told that they can't have to verbs in a sentence like this then this wouldn't be a problem. I told Yoshida-sensei that I would go slow with the next class and explain how to make 2 and 3 word sentences. Yoshida-sensei's entire teaching style consists of fretting and panicking so she is a little stressful to work with.

For the next class, 1-5, I went slow. I told them there were things called nouns and things called verbs. Yoshida-sensei freaked out because the word for noun and pronoun are different in Japanese. I said that I didn't care. That some things were people or objects or animals and others were things that are done. I would rather just teach them the words "noun' "Verb" and "Pronoun" in English and then work on short sentences everyday. But, no. They have to learn things they will never use and will only confuse them. Some kids understood, "Godzilla does karate." But class was largely unsuccessful.

Cut to lunch time. We have to record the listening test for next week. On the 4th floor is a very expensive language lab, with computers and headsets and microphones and dubbing equipment. Behind it is a store room, cold and grossly disorganized. Yoshida-sensei takes me to that room where an old tape deck sits on a cluttered table. She hooks a cheap microphone into the mic jack and hits record. She messes up the start of the script. She rewinds the tape with her fingers. (most teachers do this and I can never get a straight answer as to why.) We start again. She tells me to speak louder and get close to the mic as kids said they couldn't hear last time. I explained that when you yell in a mic you get tons of pop and static that makes it hard to understand. To much time in studios and recording has made this process painful to me. When we finally finish, pro that I am making no mistakes, we check the tape to find that the mic was cutting out during the whole process. Yoshida-sensei panics and runs off to class. I go to the Language Lab and spend 15 minutes with the system. I figure out how to record on the nice tape deck or the MD, with a set of monitoring headphones, a nice mic, and variable levels. I had to remove boxes of tissue and hundreds of copied work sheets to get to everything but...

I don't even need to make an analogy. That is the Japanese education system. Throwing sand at the floodwaters and wondering why they keep rising. When we finished recording, I tried to explain how to record on the system to Yoshida-sensei. She responded, "I can't use computers. Don't even show me. It's no good." I told her that 1-5 is her home room class, and that is just what they say about English. "Oh, you're right." She replied.

UFC 78 "Tide of Fate" How I Fared

Absolutely-and pretty much- right: Gono, Aurellio, Lauzon, Parisyan, Herman, Evans.

Wrong....WRONG!: Silva, Edgar, Alves.

Lytle was voted fight of the night, and was begging to continue when the doctor called it so.... Edgar proved he is the real deal in stomping Fisher. Alexander derailed. Evans boring. Parisyan will only KO someone with a hammer.

At least I will own up to my mistakes.

Motherfucking Cocksucking Bitches

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

My Wierd Evening

Last night was the bonenkai for my company. As I am a haken worker I know almost no one that I work with. I met them. I drank. Most people were pretty okay. I like hanging out with the African guys. I ended up at some gaijin bar drinking. I went outside to see if Tatsuya wanted to come out drinking and who should walk around the corner but Hong-Man Choi. Exactly who you expected right? Odd evening. I won't go into the whole thing but I was boht invited to join a comedy troupe and to sleep on some spare tatami in the back of a Chinese brothel/massage parlor. I didn't stay at the brothel but I did hang out and drink tea and talk about Yao Ming. I slept on a bench in Amemura and again in Shinsaibashi. I caught the Keihan local to Sanjo and mercifully slept the whole way. Oh, also in the evening, a girl told me a story about her ex-boyfriend that included a cheery story about her abortion. When I was a little surprised that she told me that she said, "Why would I care. I'm 36 and I used to be married." Excellent reasoning. Interesting evening. I am skipping the GreenEbooks party right now. It is probably pretty good, but I can't do this two nights in a row.

Housing Racism

This article delves very shallowly into the actual issues. It seems like this Kawada, who is supposed to be solving these problems, is doing so by doing nothing about the problem and buying into the racism. Landlords have severe prejudices against renting to foreigners so we have to make sure that those landlords feel more comfortable since they have to find someway to rent out their overabundance of unrented apartments. How very, very, Japanese.

Kyoto: Violence Capital of the Universe

This place be crazy.

UFC 78 "Tide of Fate" Predictions

After a great amount of consternation and soul searching, the great minds that control the UFC -Satan, Blowfeld and Daddy Warbucks- have decided to go on with their event this weekend despite the tragic deaths of Norman Mailer and Lance Hahn. Here are my predictions:

Akihiro Gono Vs. Tamdan McCrory: Gono has fought everybody. He has won some, he has lost some. Tamdan McCrory is a barn cat. Gono by decision.

Luke Caudillo Vs. Marcus Aurellio: Aurellio is at the tale end of a carer that looked as if it would be storied. Caudillo has some nutty tattoos, a good record and fails to interest me. Aurellio by submission in the 3rd.

Jason Reinhardt Vs. Joe Lauzon: I loved Joe Lauzon. Then he went to train with B.J. Penn. Now I must super-love him. He looks like the crazy kid on the block who took his treehouse a little too seriously. He fights with a rare furry. Plus Reinhardt looks like a gross guy who hangs out at a restaurant down by the docks and has dinosaur arms. Lauzon by death whenever he feels like it.

Chris Lytle Vs. Thiago Alves: Alves is Brazilian and fights for American Top Team. I should be for him. But I will be consistent ; I have said that I think that Lytle can fight anyone to a decision. I say that still. Lytle by decision.

Frank Edgar Vs. Spencer Fisher: Edgar is an impressive fighter. I don't care for Miletich fighters, nevertheless; Fisher by 2nd round KO.

Ryo Chonan Vs. Karo Parisyan: This is the fight that most interests me. Chonan has always put on exciting fights. He beat Anderson Silva with a now notorious submission. Parisyan, despite his boorish appearance on TUF is one of my favortie fighters to watch...ever. He has made the smoothest transition from judoka to MMA. His use of judo throws without the gi is incredible. For being a powerful, explosive guy, he has little to no knockout power. Parisyan by decision.

Joe Doerkson Vs. Ed Herman: All of my better senses tell me Doerkson by submission. He has tons of experience and a solid sub game. Somehow I think this is the fight were Herman's strength and ability come together. Herman by bloody TKO in the 3rd.

Thiago Silva Vs. Houston Alexander: I have yet to witness the Houston Alexander phenomenon , but I believe in it. Alexander by 1st round KO.

Michael Bisping Vs. Rashad Evans: Bisping is a guy that you know that is very athletic. Rashad Evans is an athlete. I don't know if he is the real deal as an MMA champion, but he is the real deal as an athelte. Bisping won't be able to keep Evans off of him. Evans by 3rd round TKO.

Take it to the office.

Chipper

My mom has become strangely obsessed with her new dog. Hi mom. You have become strangely obsessed with your new dog. We had another dog. I think he was treated poorly as he was a product of a failed marriage. He died. Sorry mom. So my mom wants everyone to vote for how cute her dog is. She also called me to ask if she could throw away all of my old soccer trophies and my taekwondo belt and uniform. Interesting. Very interesting. Is this what April and I get for not giving her grandbabies.

Japanese Science

Last Friday in class I mentioned something about tomatoes being a fruit. The class went nuts and yelled at me. One boy said, "Well, what about cucumbers!?!" When I said that tomatoes have seeds inside them. I told him to look into it himself and said that if tomatoes were really a vegetable I would jump off the roof of the school. Forgetting that a student in Kobe recently killed himself that way. I kind of meant it in the sense of 'pigs can fly' or something. Bad job me. Wednesday in the office I was trying to explain to Nakajima-sensei, the teacher of that class, why tomatoes are a fruit. Her response was, "Maybe in foreign countries it is." Okay. Okay. It isn't a big deal. I am sure in America people would argue with you about tomatoes being a fruit. But, you know that in Japan this is going to be the default excuse. The laws of science in Japan are not the laws of science in the rest of the universe. This used to be the joke at Kansai Gaidai when I first moved here. Even among educated people they believe crazy things, like Japanese people have shorter intestines. Or the famous reasoning in the Alex Kerr book stating that Japan can't put power lines underground because the soil in Japan is unique. Of course, people all over the world have stupid beliefs not based in science, it is just astonishing how close tot he surface the essential Japanese belief that they are a different people in a country set aside from the rest of the world. This belief is so strong it offsets the laws of science. I got the science teacher involved. All the teachers gathered around as she searched the internet and pronounced me right. They were still reluctant to accept it. I kept saying "Vegetable is a culinary term, fruit is also a scientific term. Vegetables don't exist in science. They are unsweet edible plant products." They gradually believed me. Reluctantly. We agreed that maybe peanut butter and celery could be tasty.

Know Your Rights

Here is an article about your legal rights concerning gaijin cards in Japan.

Nick Diaz

Really. I don't know why they called the fight. War Nick Diaz!

Florida

Florida don't play son.

Reagan=Racist?

Why the question mark you ask? No reason whatsoever. It should be an exclamation point. Have you been following the ongoing brouhaha in the NYT? David Brooks, on staff moron, insists that Reagan's campaign kickoff speech in Neshoba, Mississippi about 'states rights' was all a big coincidence. Krugman fired back. As did Bob Herbert. I will save space and let them outline the issues. The only thing that I will state is that the biggest joke in the press today, and there are many, is the constant charade that Republicans didn't gain control of the South, and then the government by playing to racists. They will talk about 'values voters' and 'Christian conservatives.' They will come up with 900 other reasons than the fact the LBJ signed away the South when he signed the Civil Rights Act. Reagan knew what he was doing, Lee Atwater said so. Nixon knew what he was doing. So did the Bushes. I will give the current Bush this litle bit of credit; I do get the feeling that, personally, he is not that wedded to a racist philospohy, just a classist one. That has not, however, stopped him, and every other Republican in the country from reaping the success that racists, and racism bring them. Believe it.

And I Don't Feel so Good Myself

I still haven't written more about Lance Hahn being dead because I figure that the people who care enough about it already feel sick about it and those that don't would have a hard time understanding. On the other side of the spectrum, Norman Mailer died. Mailer was sour everywhere Lance was sweet. Mailer was praised in every way that Lance was overlooked. They both seem just as important to me. I enjoy Mailer for being brash and outspoken and full of himself. I wish I could feel half as talented as he did when he was just talking in his sleep. An enjoyable guy. I good writer. Here is a link to his essay The White Negro which I remember loving at some point in time. I don't know if I still do. I'll read it again. I like the rhythm in his essays, like a pudgy white man who took on boxing as a hobby. The atheist in the foxhole: Norman Mailer.