Thursday, June 7, 2007

I just got back from a long walk around my neighborhood. I walked north up Shirakawa to Heian-jingu. Kyoto might be the most beautiful city on the face of the earth. I was in Osaka today. I returned to the Asian Trade Center to sign the contract for my new job. Two great coincidences have emerged. I will be teaching at three junior high schools in Osaka City. One of the schools is in Mikuni, which is one train stop away from my friend's new restaurant in Shonai.
Coincidence two: I usually list my favortie Japanese memory as the time in college that I entered the Danjiri Matsuri in Ikuno-ku. I wil now be teaching there. I am so stoked about this it is hard to explain. Ikuno-ku is well known for the predominance of Zainichi Koreans. I am really looking forward to working there.

Since I have quit/been fired I haven't stopped to think how fortunate I am to live where I do and do the work that I am able to. I have been stuck in this horrible school surrounded by such pointless negativity that I have locked myself in my room with Winning Eleven and Ritz crackers and tried to fight off the nervous shivers. Fuck that shit. I have two days left and I am sure that it will be a roller coaster ride, but I can take it. I quit, in part, because the abuse is unbearable. But now that I have stated that out loud and am leaving, the abuse is just absurd.

The Asian Trade Center is growing on me. If it could integrate in some larger way with its surroundings it could be far more interesting. Of course I think that about everywhere. It would all be great if it were connected with wilderness corridors and backed up by national health care. Don't you think a lot of people would live part of the times in the woods, or traveling without steady employment if they had complete health-care coverage? Don't you think that would make for a better country? Maybe it is just me.

I am not naive enough to think that bad things won't arise with my new job. For starters, it is glorified scab work and I object to the basic ideas behind the position. It is union breaking. Bu it will be the first time in a while that I won't be the prisoner of a small school owners whims. I really dislike that position. While it can come with great freedom and the feeling of playing for a team if everything is going right, it can also be like visiting your friend's house when you are a kid, you never know what the crazy rules are going to be and what crazy mood you might have walked in on. I had more to write about being an immigrant, and the dynamic between Eikaiwa and proper teachers but I am worn out and have to go face the beast tomorrow. I think I will just try and act like an adult.

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attempting to silence the voices in my head.